Since I got back from London this week things have felt a bit disconnected. I've spent so much time away lately - both physically, in Brighton & London, and mentally, that I feel a bit out of sync with my usual life. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, it's just a slightly odd feeling.

Friday was my youngest niece's birthday, so I spent lunch at my sister's, eating too much party food, giving presents and enjoying the dog. It was a great end to the week.

Today has been a shopping day and a pottering day, with a little added car maintenance - only replacing a bulb but it involved taking bits apart and was far more complicated than is strictly necessarily.

This evening I'm stranded on the sofa with a bottle of wine and trashy TV. Against my better judgement I seem to be strangely addicted to The X-Factor. Make it stop!

London - 2

Anish Kapoor

The exhibition I really wanted to see was Anish Kapoor at the Royal Academy. I've only ever seen small pieces of his work, not the big pieces he tends to do in public spaces, and this one sounded particularly exciting.

The highlight was a huge block of wax that moved along a track through five separate galleries, scraping the door frames and leaving wax on them as it passes through. And when I say huge I mean the size of a big van. The way the building is soiled by it as it moves through is quite thrilling - galleries are usually pristine white spaces, not spattered with red wax.

Taking it one step further is a gallery in which a cannon fires a big bullet of wax at a wall, which then slides down the wall onto the floor. Other highlights include a room full of mirrors that distort your shape as you look into them and a large yellow square that recesses into the wall in a strange optical illusion kind of way.

But my favourite bit was outside - a tall sculpture made up of large silver balls stacked on top of each other. It's stunning and deserves a permanent home somewhere fabulous. Far too many pictures here:

anish kapoor london october 2009

Shoes

My gorgeous brown leather Camper shoes are nearly dead. They're still as comfy as slippers and don't look too bad, but the sole is wearing thin as a fat man has worn them constantly for 18 months:



Time for a replacement pair then! But as is the way with fashion that pair have been 'retired' so after trying on three pairs from a shortlist of about twelve I bought these:



I know they're the same but black but they're gorgeous!

London - 1

Hoxton

I didn't really know what time Morrissey would finish so rather than risk not getting back, or getting back at some hideously late hour, I booked a hotel. But not just any hotel: The Hoxton Urban Lodge! I stayed there last summer and it's simply stunning, quite probably the nicest hotel I've ever stayed in, even better than the $200 a night one I stayed in when I went to New York for the first time. And because I booked during one of their sales the room was only £29! Hurrah! It's so nice I could happily have spent the evening looking at the lovely bathroom, but of course I didn't.

Last time I was there I was with someone else's boyfriend. We had a fabulous stay, so fabulous in fact that when he went back to his normal life he couldn't speak to me any more! Thanks for that. I would like to stay there with someone gorgeous next time as it has a lovely bar downstairs that would be lovely to try, but I don't do sitting in bars on my own.

Tate Modern

I love Tate Modern! It's the most fabulous thing that's happened to London in years! This visit there were two things I wanted to see:

How it is - this is the winter exhibition in the turbine hall - a huge steel box with a ramp at one end so you can walk into it. The inside is lined with black, maybe velvet, and as you get further and further into it I think it's supposed to become harder to see and more disorienting.

Except it wasn't. Well it was a bit disorienting, but you could still see people in it which then spoilt the effect. I guess if you went in one person at a time it might work better, but as it is it didn't do it for me. I'd rather hoped it would be like Antony Gormley's box of cloud/fog that was in the Hayward Gallery a few summers ago: so much fog you couldn't see your hand in front of your face, and yet bright at the same time. Fantastic!

Pop Life - this is an exhibition of artists who combine Art and Business. A nice idea as Art is now hugely expensive and something to be taken very, very seriously. But again this didn't really work for me.

The bad bits:

Several rooms full of European artists whose stuff I didn't know at all, which seemed a bit derivative.

A room for a Japanese artist whose work seems to be one of those large Manga-style cartoon characters, which also appears on shoes, t-shirts and all sorts of other merchandise. But couldn't you say the same about The Simpsons?!

Damien Hirst. Oh how I hate him! There was one of his animals in a tank, which always make me squeamish; a dot painting with a gold background (because Damien is big on gold at the minute); a butterfly painting in gold - see! - with added diamonds; but worst of all were two gold frames filled with shelves of diamonds - it was tacky, vulgar and vacuous - no doubt incredibly expensive too, but it was shit!

The good bits:

Andy Warhol - because Andy Warhol is always a good thing! And he started the whole Art as Business thing off, and yet did it with such style. I'm a huge fan so I never tire of his stuff.

Jeff Koons - very 80s, so very big business, but his stuff always make me smile. In this exhibition there's a room full of stuff he made with his pornstar wife - pictures and statues of them having sex. They make me laugh as he makes himself look so incredibly handsome, so much more so than in real life, although I do sneakily fancy him a bit.

Keith Haring - they've recreated his Pop Shop that he opened in New York to sell his t-shirts and stuff. They plays 80s electro pop to set the mood and the walls and floors are covered with his dancing men. Fabulous!

Tracey Emin - I know her stuff sells for a lot of money, but it's so intensely personal it doesn't seem to belong here. However at the start of her career she opened a shop with another artist to sell their work, so it all makes sense. There's one of her embroidered blankets on show which is just gorgeous!

So a mixed visit, but it's always fab to be there!

Rocktober - gig 4 - Morrissey!!!

Non-believers might want to come back another time because there will be madness.

Let's begin with a picture, specially for Roger - it's from the inner sleeve of Morrissey's new b-sides CD:



Hello sailor!

So let's recap.

May was Morrissey month - I had tickets for three gigs in the same week, but it got off to a slightly disastrous start with a couple of nights being cancelled, including the first night I had tickets for, at the Royal Albert Hall. It was rescheduled so I booked a hotel and got all excited about it again. Then this Saturday Morrissey collapsed on stage after one song then spent the night in hospital, cancelling Monday night's gig too. Things didn't look hopeful for Tuesday, despite the fact that his people - and bizarrely his new mate Jonathan Ross - were insisting it would go ahead. So I set off to London with plenty of alternatives up my sleeve for when he cancelled.

But he didn't!

I was very apprehensive about what his performance would be like: would he collapse again? would his voice be buggered? would he be tired? grumpy? shit? Astonishingly he was none of those things: he was magnificent! His voice sounded better than I've ever heard it - possibly helped by the fantastic acoustics in the venue - and he just raced through the set with so much energy!

The set was his usual mixture of stuff, with some Smiths songs amongst his solo stuff. There were a few songs from his b-sides album and some recent singles, but he doesn't delve back very far into his solo back catalogue which is always a shame as some of his best work is there. Highlights? Well, it was always going to be interesting hearing Irish Blood, English Heart, a song about identity which has taken on a more patriotic meaning, played in the home of the Proms, and most famously the last night of the Proms with it's mad flag waving. But the biggest highlight was The World is full of crashing bores, an album track and not necessarily one of my favourites, but as the crowd sang the chorus there was something so fantastic about it I was moved to tears. Big girl.

The band are amazing too so I never understand why they always get dismissed as a pub band. They don't do the delicate gentle guitar playing that Johnny Marr used to do but Morrissey doesn't right songs like that anymore - they're argumentative and confident, just like the man himself.

And the Royal Albert Hall? Stunning venue! You have to hand it to the Victorians - they were mad geniuses! The whole place looks a bit like a wedding cake but it's beautiful and the sound inside is fantastic. And down on the floor it felt quite small and intimate. Pity it's twenty minutes from the nearest Tube but you can't have everything....

It was an emotionally draining evening - at first I thought it would be cancelled, then I thought it would be rubbish, then it was brilliant - a real rollercoaster of emotions, so by the end I was just a wreck, but in a good way. You don't get that with Coldplay...

And finally, as a 'reward' to any of you who made it this far, here's the first song from last night, filmed on a mobile phone from the somewhere high above the stage - as soon as this start it sent a shiver down my spine: Morrissey, you truly are God!!



Oooh, it looks like most of the gig is on YouTube - there goes the rest of my evening!

I've really got my work/life balance sorted at the moment - I'm hardly ever at work!

Two weeks ago I had a whole week off; last week I only did four days; this week I'm doing three and a half. Clearly the future is part time!

I'm off to London to see Morrissey, assuming he doesn't cancel at the last minute, which lots of people fear he might. Cross your fingers and think good thoughts!

Yesterday morning I had this year's first Christmas shopping trip with my mother. I'd be happy if it were the last! We must have looked for a make-up bag in every shop that might possibly sell them and more besides! And I'm still mystified by them - some of them looked like a purse, some like a bag, and all were far too frumpy for a 10 year old who just needs something to put her nail varnish in. Argos vouchers all round I think...

In the evening I went to see Broken Embraces, the latest Pedro Almodovar film. As is his way it's quite a complicated story, involving a film within a film, a documentary and flashbacks. Essentially it's about how a film director lost his sight, but it's also about jealousy and obsession, and is obviously all about film.

It stars Penelope Cruz, who often looks exactly like Audrey Hepburn in it, who plays an actress starring in a film that looks a lot like Almodovar's Women on the verge of a nervous breakdown - told you it was complicated! Penelope is of course fabulous! She looks stunning and her acting is effortless and completely believable.

It's an odd film, it feels slightly disappointing and overly complicated but then it ends and I found it had lodged itself in my brain. I think I should see it again as it would probably be a lot richer second time round.

Today I've mostly been distracted by Morrissey. It's been a "will he? won't he?" kind of day - will he cancel the gig I have a ticket for tomorrow or not? I was thinking yes - no one goes from hospital to Royal Albert Hall in two days! But apparently it's going to happen. I still suspect it will be cancelled at the last minute, when it's too late to make alternative arrangements, but I'm happy to be proven wrong!

His new album turned up today - a b-sides collection, which sounds dull but actually isn't - they're great songs, too good to be hidden on CD singles no one will ever play or buy. And the packaging is fab - Morrissey in a sailor suit! I'm swooning!

Brighton

It rained on Wednesday, for what seemed like the first time in months and what was definitely the first time since I had the new car roof fitted. The roof leaked.

So at 6.30am on Friday I left the house and headed to Brighton again, arriving in the middle of a rain shower - too late for it to prove the roof leaked, but timed just so I would get wet as a I walked into town.

Having only just been there I was a bit stuck for things to do. The lovely man who makes stained glass is in Hungary so there was no chance of seeing him. Plan B had been to go to London, but the garage said it would only take a couple of hours to sort out so I opted to go shoe shopping instead.

Amazingly I found a whole new load of shops, what looked like Brighton's equivalent to Oxford Street - how on earth could I have missed those before?! And yet still I couldn't find the prefect shoe. I'm desperate for a new pair of gorgeous Camper shoes as mine are on their last legs, but despite their website telling me seven places sold them I only found them in two and the choice was really poor.

So I gave up and sat on the pier with an ice cream instead, reading the paper until the garage rang to say it was all fixed. I ended up getting home at 5.30pm, so it was a long day, but it was worth it as it's all fixed now - not a single leak during yesterday's rain shower, although I realise by typing that I'm tempting fate somewhat...

And Brighton? I was excited to be back, despite only being there a week ago. I think I've fallen for it's charms, so I'm promising myself I'll go back in the spring.

London

Yesterday I was supposed to go to London with Trish to see the Affordable Art Fair but I was knackered and it was raining so we didn't go - sorry about that Trish xxx.

Instead I had a nice family day and spent a really nice couple of hours in the afternoon with my sister, helping her to assemble furniture - they're almost at the point of moving back into their house and she's so excited about it! It's nice to spend time with her and her husband, because although I have nothing in common with him - he's an Irish-Catholic builder, I'm a big fat poof - he really does love her and it's so sweet!

Then I came home and watched more TV than is good for me, and ate more Chinese food than is good for me. So this morning I feel fat enough to burst and my brain feels slightly melted by the shit I watched.

Morrissey

I'm going to see Morrissey on Tuesday night. Or maybe not: he collapsed on stage last night - only the second night of his autumn tour - after one song and spent the night in hospital. He's not dead, despite what the rumours say, but I'm not holding out any hope of seeing him this week. I just hope he gets better and has a long rest so this kind of thing never happens again, because I'm not sure my nerves can stand it!